Being a Man that is Comfortable in his Own Skin

I meet weekly with a group of guys in my church.  They are from all walks of life:  college student, factory worker, human resource director/office manager, department store, Starbucks, assistant manager in a local hotel.  But, they all have one thing in common: they all realize a call...a destiny for their lives.  And, it's my privilege as their pastor, their mentor, and their friend, to challenge them and to help them process what that looks like.  One challenge I have heard from the Lord as the year is drawing to a close is to direct my group to go on a quest to discover what true masculinity looks like for a man of God.

Our culture obviously has no idea, by the sheer fact that there is so much confusion about what a man is supposed to be. We are in a generation of men that really has no idea how to act or what to do.  Our culture has painted the picture of men as either idiots, lazy, insensitive, or sex-crazed as compared to our female counterparts (just watch any television sitcom to get this message).  We are told regularly to get in touch with our "feminine side."  I loved how my spiritual papa, Kenny Thacker, responded to that:   "I got in touch with my feminine side...I married her!"  Of course men and women are different!  Eve was taken from Adam...we are two unique individuals that complete each other.  Men must assert themselves as the truly amazing creatures God's made us to be.  So, we definitely must get our definition of masculinity from God and His Word, not culture, men's magazines or Internet sites.


In our local context at River of Life Foursquare Church, it gets further complicated because, as a Foursquare Church, we embrace women at all levels of leadership. We believe we represent the kingdom of God best when we, as men and women, work together, bearing the image of God, fulfilling all that God has for us (which is what sets us  apart from many other denominations and movements in the body of Christ, and I've come to terms with that....especially being married to a strong woman who is one of my favorite preachers and is a dynamic leader.)

We are a conservative denomination, but we allow men and women not only to preach, but to direct ministries, pastor ministries and churches...our National General Supervisor is a woman, as is my District Supervisor!.  We want our children to be taught by both men and women, so we have just as many men involved in children's ministry as we do women, a job I've seen other churches relegate mainly to women. Even down to the fact that we have a lot of guys that enjoy cooking and baking (especially me!), so just as many men as women prepare and bring food for our potlucks. And, our maintenance director is a woman.

So, in my mind, it's of the utmost important that we know as men of God what true masculinity look like.  It can't be relegated to sports, hunting, fishing, and cars.  There has to be something more than that.

Granted, I could be terribly wrong...but that's what a quest is all about, right?

SO.......beginning in January, my little "cadre" and I are going to be reading through a great book by Dudley Hall called Men in their Own Skin: Answering the Call to Confident Manhood.  The plan is for us to read a chapter a week, talk about it in our individual sessions, followed each week by a summary blog from me.  My hope is that even a small group of men beginning to walk out true spiritual manhood will have a definite effect not only on married couples, but on our single brothers and sisters, our sons and daughters, as well as our wives.

So, I invite you to come along with us in our discussion.  Heck, get a copy of the book and read along with us.  You can purchase it from this link:   Successful Christian Living Ministries Website.